A couple got married and for one year they could not do the DO because the guy’s D could not do!

They did not talk about this before marriage!

These are important topics to talk about to avoid divorce later.

1. Sex: This is a major lubricant for a successful marriage. Many people have gone into marriage with different and rigid mindsets about sex leading to sexual dissatisfaction. Ask sex related questions before you marry and know where each of you stands with the different types of sex so that you are clear what you want to be committed to in marriage. This is not a sin!

2. Religion: When people marry those of different spiritual beliefs and significantly different doctrines, there’s bound to be clashes in that marriage. Marry your type! Don’t be carried away by your emotions saying ‘we’re in love’. Don’t marry them just because they are ‘nice’. Being nice is not a fruit of the spirit. Remember when you choose your path, you automatically choose your destination. Don’t get lost!

3. Children: I heard of a couple who got divorced because one person didn’t want children while the other person wanted. Another couple got divorced because they couldn’t have children. Please talk about these before you say ‘I do’. Talk about contraception also and whether or not you both would consider assisted forms of conception if needed. Parenting style is another big one! Talk about it.

4. Money: This is actually number 1! Some people are big spenders, some are big debtors, others are big savers. Talk about your money language, debts, perspectives about investment, types of investments you both would like, budgeting, joint or no joint account and more!

Many divorces occur as a result of these four deep seated issues in marriage.

Singles, please take time to ask intelligent questions while courting. Courtship is not a period of intercourse but a period of interview!

I pray that you get it right in marriage in Jesus name.

Regards

Dr Blessing Ekundayo

Relationship Educator and Mental Health Practitioner